BODY LANGUAGE

It's really amazing how much we tell each other without saying a word.  How we move, sit, stand, look, lean or even touch can convey what we think, feel or want.

Obviously, people who are mentally or physically challenged in using the sense of hearing, speaking, moving or seeing learn to communicate very well by compensating for any deficit they may have.  But, I am saying that those of us who have all our faculties sometimes forget or ignore the kinds of messages we send to one another.

Body language is referred to as Kinesics (pronounced “kineesicks”, from the Greek, meaning motion) and is only one aspect of the entire field of non-verbal communication.   The latter encompasses much more such as voice quality (paralanguage), touch (haptics), distance, informal space around the body (proxemics), use of time (chronemics) and eye contact (oculesics) which involves the actions of looking while talking and listening, frequency of glances, patterns of fixation, pupil dilation and blinking rate.  Body language is usually subconscious behavior and is, therefore, considered distinct from sign language, which is fully conscious and an intentional act of communication.

Given the many factors involved in body language, this article will address how body postures can affect our relationships.  Slouching, towering over another, legs spread or crossed, jaws thrust, shoulders forward, and arms crossed can send or be received as  messages interpreted as good or bad.   They can indicate the degree of (1) “openness” one may have to another person.   A person who displays a forward lean or decreases a backward lean also signifies a positive sentiment during communication.   In social situations it’s important to observe how we interact personally regardless of what we say.  Perhaps the saying, “Actions speak louder than words” has true meaning.

Studies (2) of posture on interpersonal relationships indicate that mirror-image congruent  postures, where one person’s left side is parallel to the other’s right side, leads to a favorable perception of communicators and positive speech.   Why then, for years , people are interviewed in offices usually  placed in a face to face position with the interviewer?  Perhaps that’s more of a protection for the interviewer?  It seems that such a position makes it more difficult to establish openness.

Sometimes we are not aware of  how important it is to try and  be more sensitive when connecting in social conversations.  How much are we in touch with ourselves and those around us?

1. Knapp, Mark L., & Hall, Judith A. (2007) Nonverbal Communication in Human Interaction . (5^th ed.) Wadsworth: Thomas Learning. ISBN 0-15-506372-3

2.. Bull, P. E. (1987). Posture and Gesture. Oxford: Pergamon Press. ISBN 0-08-031332-9.