TIME OUT

Murray Gellen

    I think it’s a good idea to do some mental reflections regarding who we are. After all, we are senior residents living in a retirement community. As such, we have an abundance of life experiences to think about. You may have moments of reminiscence that you might share with one another, or you might find yourself having nostalgic moments nagging you from the past.

     It’s moments of nostalgia that could trap your feelings of the past which can be depressing BUT! You are resilient and very able to move forward. If you spend too much time allowing yourself to long for the past, you will find yourself not really using your memory but even feeling so depressed that you could become resentful for the present.  

    Nostalgia can sometimes be kin to homesickness.  Reminiscing allows us to remember the past without delving into self-pity and offers us memories we can handle with ease. It seems like it’s more comfortable to share our past by reminiscing.  

    It can be a comforting experience.  Sometimes, we find ourselves smiling as we recall those past times when we just woke up over our past years.  They were and always will be precious. In our final reflections it’s “carpe diem”. It’s the present that counts. !…….…

“Seize the Moment”

 

                         WHAT IS THE TRUTH

    Most of the time I guess we think that what we say or believe is the truth. That’s fine. But keep in mind that what we consider to be the truth is only because we assume that we have an accurate concept of what we know. Maybe we need to have the patience to accept the idea that we don’t have enough evidence to conclude that we know the whole truth. It requires a certain amount of self-acceptance or humility to recognize that we don’t know the whole truth. A sense of humility can go a long way in helping us become a mature person. It takes much courage to open our minds to seek truth!

                      “Our hearts may be in the right place, but our minds need to catch up!”

   

 

 

 

                                                                          DECISIONS

                                                                       Murray Gellen    

     There are times when we are responsible to make a choice. If it is to decide what food to eat that could be easy. Why? Because it’s just for you. But if the choice relates to how you are going to decide how much to pay someone for work that was done for you it becomes more important.  Now, it means to decide the value of what was done for you. Such a decision becomes more important. It is not as easy because the decision is based on several factors such as the quality of the work done and even the personality of the person who did the work. 

   There are many more conditions and situations in life that come into play. So, even though we always have a choice as to how to react or behave, making decisions is always important. Suppose you are invited to a party and the host tells you that there will be people there who you know but have usually avoided on other occasions. What will you decide to do? Cancel your invitation? Attend the party and avoid those you have usually avoided at other times? Hmmm!... Now you have some decisions to make! The answer is all yours! 

                                 😉    “Think! …It will be an interesting experience.”   😌

 

W0RLD MONUMENT

    What you are about to read may open your mind to something you never thought about before. My wife and I have travelled around the Caribbean Archipelago over the years and visited many of the islands, but it was really an enlightening experience to learn about a very unusual place called the fortress of La Citadel Lafrenière. It is a fortress built by Henry Christophe, the Haitian revolutionary general who led the slave rebellion of freedom in 1804.

    This fortress has been designated by UNESCO as a World Heritage site in 1982   Although there are several smaller forts across the country of Haiti this fortress is the first example of African-derived colonial architecture.  

   The Citadel was constructed by over 20,000 ex-slaves, built inland 3000 feet on the mountain as a means of providing the optimal military vantage point. The location enabled Haitian forces to strategically keep watch over a vast distance, from the nearby valleys to the coastline. Cap -Haitian and the adjoining Atlantic Ocean are visible from the roof of the fortress.

    It is the largest fortress in Haiti and one of the largest in North America. The turbulent political situation principally in the central region has deterred visitors from visiting the very interesting tourist destination of the mountain Citadel.

    Maybe, this short monument may encourage you to explore another adventure at

    the “Caribbean Archipelago.”  See the Citadel below.

4-19-23

 

 

 

SPRING IS HERE

    Now is your time to wake up and smell the roses because they are all around you. Can’t you smell them?  Their aroma takes you to new views of life.  Give them a chance. You are the captain of your ship. You can go in any direction at any moment. Now is the time to make new decisions that will allow you to take new steps toward new adventures.  You need not be a genius.  Just be comfortable with what you feel, and you can steer your ship wherever you choose to go.

    There are many places or dreams you have yet to reach. It is up to you to visit any of them that meets your wishes. Just keep in mind you are always the captain of your ship. Have a good trip and enjoy every moment.

“Remember! One who hesitates can get lost.”

"😊😊😊😊😀😁😄"

😃HAVE A NICE  DAY😄

 

WHO CARES

     I wonder if there really is anyone who really lives with an indifferent attitude about life and people around you.  Sometimes and somewhere I hear people give an opinion or viewpoint about just about anything.  Whatever I hear is always  meaningful.  I don’t even ask for an opinion.  It just seems to come from anyone who speaks. There is usually a comment or two that indicates you have some remark that may be critical or even judgmental about something.  I can appreciate hearing comments that are complimentary, but I wonder why I often hear complaints or criticisms about someone or something.  Are my observations telling me you are uncomfortable or you may be annoyed?

    If you talk about life and the people you know and meet with a friendly attitude, then I am comfortable because it helps me feel you care about life.

     As it has been said:  No one promised us a rose garden.

    According to Albert Einstein:

 “Be kind to people who are different from you."

The ideals that have lighted my way, and time after time

           have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been.

  Kindness, Beauty, and Truth.”

LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP

    Take your time before you decide what you want to do. Yes, the holiday season is just around the corner. There is so much excitement and joy beckoning for our attention. It’s almost mind boggling to make choices. But that’s ok if we don’t resort to impulsive decisions.  We are all not out of the woods with corvid or many social problems.  Being cavalier, that is not serious or caring enough about matters that other people are serious about can be neglectful of their feelings. Even amidst the joys of the season it pays to be cautious and avoid risks to our personal health.

    Keep in mind we all have the privilege to choose what we like and don’t like to do. Take some time to ask yourself what is most important to you. There is no rush to find answers to your thoughts.  It takes patience to avoid impulsive wishes. When we look around the world is here for us, and we can enjoy each day if we care about what is available to each of us.

    Relax and look carefully at our options for feeling comfortable. They keep popping up at us yet, we don’t have to jump to them.

“Look before you leap.”

12-1-22                                          "😄😄😄😄"

 

 STAYING CONNECTED

     We come into this world alone but is it fair to leave, to leave it alone? Yes, that’s a fair question. I guess while we are here there really isn’t an easy answer.  Sure, for our life there is a lot to do.  We could accept the end.  But not yet. Why? Because we have so many things to do and see. You can still be alone and an individual with a vitality to enjoy many of others around you.  Most important you can meet new friends and find new relationships.  The thought that you are alone or feel lonely is merely a time out zone where you might allow yourself to feel sorry, lonely or a feeling that you are being left out.  But you are not left out.  Remember, you oversee your life.  You have a lifelong license to do so many things, go to so many places. So, what is stopping you? Some say you are lonely and feeling sorry for yourself.  I speak. It’s because you have temporarily disconnected and got off the track. Wallowing in sorrow is no excuse for storing your strength.    

    You know many abilities you have from many experiences you had on responsibilities you have had in your career of work.  They are never lost. They have been disconnected temporarily. Why?  Maybe, because they offer no challenges to you. So, you owe it to yourself to get back on track to feel accomplishment. 

“Your train only goes forward.”

 

10-25-22

 

 

 

 

DRIVE TO SURVIVE

    We are all motivated to find our way each day to find satisfaction for our existence any way that gives us peace of mind if not satisfaction.  We feel that whatever we believe makes sense to us.  We get a feeling that everything is not what we like or want but, we seem to think we are justified in thinking we are right even if we are not fair in all our decisions.  It’s very important to us that no matter what we think, say or, believe is certainly acceptable to everyone else, But the facts of the matter don’t seem to result that way. why? Why? Maybe, we really either don’t care what others hear us say or we feel they are against us. Oh, no what we say or believe is the truth. There is no need for defending our point of view. After all, our thinking is as good as anyone else’s point of view.  

   Now, maybe it’s time to take a breath and start to become more open minded and begin to reflect on how we believe and think.  Taking the time to reflect on what we think and believe may open our mind to what is sometimes called the………

“AHAH! PHENOMENON”

   This is the moment or time when one sits down in a comfortable chair and begins to do some thinking about what drives one so hard to survive.  What is really so important to drive one to think what we think or believe is so immutable, absolute or unalterable. Yes, it takes an open mind to seek satisfaction for our existence.

 

 SERVING THE COMMUNITY

  Living in our community since 2001, I have learned how important it is to respect what it means to be part of it.  I have had the opportunity to be active in many of the activities that have been made available. Many of you may know that I served as a Board member for two terms. I remember hearing residents’ comment that it was a thankless position and often perceived as an ego trip for some who sought recognition. I say that, to me, that was and has never been my perception.  Being elected to the Board was an honor. It was an endorsement of the residents’ trust and confidence in me that I would serve their interests as primary.

    Over the years, I have seen an erosion of the ideals that I cherished to be the primary mission of each Board member. What I have observed is that some members’ desire for personal recognition and power has gotten in their way. Yes, significant attributes of leadership are the ability to express empathy, patience, warmth, and sincere interest in the sentiments of others. It seems that the fiscal matters of the community are so significant and somehow have become so dominant that there has been a loss of insight into the human sentiments, opinions, or views of some board members.  

    Yes, knowledge of management is important but need not supersede the human             relation skill to enhance goodwill for all.

                         "Please open your minds to what your mission is."      

 

WHERE IS THE P0WER

I guess it all depends upon where we want it.  Throughout history humans have developed social systems which have established rules for controlling or managing our social behavior.  Some of these have found their source from establishing power structures that have been distinguished by one or more several characteristics such as nobility, fame, wealth, education, corporate, religious, political, or even military control.

Historically, these power structures have become tyrannical that rely on public obedience that have emerged into what are called oligarchies.  The origin of oligarch is derived from the Greek (oligarchies)(obliges) “few”-and the (arkhA”,” rule”) Oligarchy is one of numerous English words for a type of rule or government that has come to refer to rule by an economic elite.

It appears that our country faces some of the oligarchic conditions to challenge us not to be consumed by its conditions. Fortunately, our democratic way of life provides many avenues for us to support a healthy economic environment. It is important to maintain the balance of power by our democratic and constitutional process.

 

3-22-2022

 

 

 

TRUTH’S PERSPECTIVES

    Ordinarily, we refer to the property of truth as being in accord with the facts or reality as we experience things, Truth is usually held to be the opposite of falsehood.  Most of what we believe is based upon the everyday news we are exposed to in the newspaper, television, or social media available. It is quite a challenge for anyone.

   Our society has always been open to various points of view and it is a challenge for anyone to accept what is the truth.  Sometimes, what we see, hear, or read appears to be the truth.  But think for a moment.  It’s truth if it fits your belief system.  How careful are we to sift out what is true?  Please keep in mind that the power of social media can be astounding, amazing and even distorted in providing information.  How willing are we to understand the perspectives that influence our individual or group decisions and consequently our actions that allow us to know what is truth?

   The Human Dynamics Institute provides an inquiry process to help us create opportunities to move out of dilemmas and find new ways to seek an understanding of the perspective of truth. There are four model perspectives of truth that can allow us the best fit to identify what is truth to each one of us.

We can see truth as:

1.  Objective--What exists and can be proved.  The sun moves each day.

2.  Normative--What we as a group agree is true. The word day that time when the sky is lit.               

3.  Subjective--How we see the world. Today is a good day for me.

4.  Complex--How we focus on the truth most useful to us at one time.

   Instead of drawing a conclusion of one perception, take time to identify clues of how other people are thinking.  Share your observations of the situation to help others make sense of what’s happening.

   It takes an open mind to avoid being blindsided dealing with such thinking that blunts the encouragement of open discourse. 

“There are three sides to every thought. 

 Yours, the other person's, and the truth.”

 

 

 

 

JUDGMENT

    Almost every day we are faced with a situation that requires every one of us to make decisions.  Yes, the pandemic haunts us with how to respond to it. How do we deal with it?  We are flooded with information that is overwhelming and many times confusing. Yet, we are responsible to find a way to make decisions that are for our safety.  No one has all the answers, and we try to make decisions that are not always easy.

 Why? There is so much information flooding us that we are faced with making serious judgments of what to do. Making judgments is based on careful thought. If you decide to wear or not wear a mask, remember that such a decision has a consequence. It’s important to understand that using good common sense implies a reliable ability to judge and decide with a sense tempered and refined by experience.

   Maturity usually implies a full development and the ability to make judgments in the best interests of others as well as oneself. Given the pandemic facing us we still can make sound and sensible judgments. With wisdom we have information that provides us with the opportunity to judge what is in our best interests.

 

   

 BALANCING FREEDOM

We cherish our freedom as Americans and recognize the importance of maintaining our rights as provided by our constitution.  Yet today, more than ever before we are faced with a pandemic that is presenting us with a personal health issue that is really life threatening. Why? Medical science has provided a safe way to protect us from serious illness or death by using vaccination. In a paradoxical sense, to be vaccinated or not is placing some of us in a frightening dilemma for a multitude of reasons. Some of us are faced with anxiety or beliefs as to the possible infringement on our fundamental freedom of choice. Others feel that the choice is such a personal matter and it is our fundamental right to make any decision regarding to be vaccinated or not. Some of us have no confidence in the advancement of medical science.

The interesting observation is that no one is ultimately denied the choice to be or not be vaccinated.  However, we have responsibility to maintain health habits that help protect other citizens and themselves from exposure to the virus. That means they have responsibility to see that their own health habits are maintained.

                   

 INTENSITY

\Whether we like it or not,\the world is changing in front of our eyes. Regardless of the pandemic ,some things can be overwhelming.  Just look at the sky, seas, mountains, the cities, and our social relationships.  Each is taking on new dimensions far beyond what we might expect.

 Sometimes, in a matter of moments we are astounded, amazed, surprised, that they all occur so unexpectedly or with such an impact.  We are not satisfied with what we see. For example, we have, in fact, reached the moon.  But that’s not enough. Now, we are searching for ways beyond the origin of our universe.

Our social relationships have blossomed into new culture patterns that introduced new patterns of art and music that leave us momentarily impassioned with new and exciting fervor, emotions, and excitement. We are impacted with the new "Moyne de Vie" way of seeing life.

Such intensity can serve as a catalyst to help us meet our feelings of rapid change.

                                 “Life does not block our ability to change.”

 

 

L00SEN THE  GATE

    No matter where I look, there is evidence of the impact of the pandemic.  It is evident that we face it almost every day and even feel it when we try to direct our attention to pleasant thoughts. It seems to be haunting us.   Yet, how do we cope with the misery that preys on us?  I believe it’s a matter of taking steps to make conditions less severe and intimidating.  I suggest we try to mitigate what we encounter.

    To mitigate is to take steps to reduce the severity of a pandemic atmosphere. To mitigate is derived from the Latin roots mitis,” soft”, and agree, “to do/act,” which add up to “to soften.” It is often used with words that indicate an outcome or something harmful.

    I am aware of situations where I notice some people tend to be unduly critical and even condescending in their relationship with others.  Such an attitude or behavior only distances one person from another.  I sincerely believe each of us can mitigate; that is, take steps to reduce the probability of serious estrangement of one person to another.

“It’s never too late to loosen the gate.”

 

ANGST

This term may appear somewhat strange to see but it carries a remarkably interesting meaning.  It first came to my attention many years ago when I was in graduate school and has lingered in my mind.  The word was introduced into English from the Danish, Norwegian, Dutch, and German word angst.  It has been evident since the 19^th century in the English translations of works by Soren Kierkegaard and Sigmund Freud.  Their early ideas carry a specific conceptual meaning used in English to refer to a profound and intense feeling of apprehension, as “dread “or “anxiety”. This deep-seated condition is guided solely in non-human animals by instinct.  Human beings enjoy a freedom of choice that is found to be appealing and yet terrifying.  It is the power of choice that, at times, becomes a real challenge.  Anxiety can occur with a feeling of worry, concern, apprehension, or consternation.

Another way of understanding anxiety is comparing it to fear.

The object of fear is clearly identified.  If one is fearful of dogs one can avoid them.  However, anxiety has no direct object.  It is an emotional condition in which one experiences uncertainty, worry, unease, or tension.  This condition can be very disabling for one to function easily and resolve an issue.

“It has been said that there are three sides to every issue”.

“Yours, the other side and the truth.”

 

OUR VENTILATING ARENA

Murray Gellen

    A message is usually defined as a short communication sent from one person to another of a central idea.  Often, in a residential community, messages are transmitted and displayed on an electronic message board that are displayed for any resident who has access to it.  Given this vehicle, one who receives a message is free to respond to the sender.  Interesting to note, it means that any resident who has use of the message board may respond to the sender or introduce additional information to the original sender or other residents who are free to view such a message.  The nature of the message board provides an open arena for just about any topic that comes to one’s mind.  However, in our community, there are guidelines that attempt to protect and monitor messages transmitted to assure freedom of expression and, at the same time, protect viewers form derogatory commentary. The message board is the place to welcome opinions and a variety of viewpoints,

    One may note that the message board receives messages for information as to where one might contact a plumber, a doctor or where to purchase a particular window or refrigerator company. But, then there are opinions regarding the community Board’s considered recommendations or decisions.  It is still the right of residents to offer opinions regarding issues facing the community. It appears that many of these matters of the Board would be better served if members of the message board addressed their concerns directly to Board members than to each other. Yes, it is a free ventilating arena to express one’s opinion regarding a Board’s actions or decisions. However, it appears that more often it agitates message board senders toward each other over issues. Matters of community governance need to be directed to the Board than to each other.

                                          " Yes, it is an open arena." 

                                                         PERSPECTIVE

                                                                      Murray Gellen

     Sometimes, how we look at the world in different ways may influence our whole attitude toward our lives. Undoubtedly, over a year we have been faced with a pandemic that has had a devastating impact on our lives. Yet, there is a unique attribute each of has that allows us to cope with what faces us. I am not sure what that is but despite loss or pain the human being has the resilience to survive. Sometimes. I think it is the never-ending motivation to find a surcease from sorrow or the desire to feel free from feelings of emptiness.

     In any event, there is always some energy to find relief. It is that very energy that becomes the force to move forward and not backward, if one is fully aware that options exist, desperate feelings can minimize. I am sure we have heard that we can see a cup as half-filled or half-empty. Unfortunately, there are moments of desperation that are so high our emotions can block our path to reasoning. Yet, the calm moments we have can be used as fire drills to prepare us for the unexpected. It seems like the pandemic is so impacting that one can feel there is no end. But the arrival of vaccines is the sun on the horizon. They provide the steps toward normalcy.

     There is still a caution to how we accept the process of vaccination given all the variations and alien viruses still prevailing. It is important for us to maintain our confidence in science that provides us with the steps to eliminating infection. We need to recognize that mitigation is still a valuable tool for prevention. Simply getting vaccinations is not eliminating all infection attributable to corvid 19. But, they are excellent for along with the continued effort of all of us to abide by the health rules of protecting each other. That is, maintaining social distancing, washing our hands, even wearing a mask, and avoiding crowds. After all, we never are to forget how easily we can contaminate others.

                            “An ounce of prevention is still worth a pound of cure.”

 

THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER

   When we think about art, we usually admire the picture we see and wonder how the person renders such a beautiful picture. It impresses us to see such creative work.  We tend to think it takes an incredibly talented person to produce works of art. But what we see as beauty is really in the eye of the beholder. When you pick up a pencil, pen or paint brush and you let your feelings flow as you look at what you create there is that moment of pleasure you can experience if you sit back and enjoy what you see. Remember, you are the judge of what you produce. The enjoyment of your art comes from the feelings of satisfaction generated from what you see.  Creativity is the unique identity you can develop. Our imagination is our powerful tool to generate all kinds of satisfaction. Let your feelings flow through painting, drawing and even writing. There are no boundaries for our mind to grow.

   If you allow your imagination to find its way to your mind you can create art that is your own personal picture. What you begin to sketch, draw, or paint you see as something outside of yourself that is emotionally exciting. Why? It is part of you that is a unique mirror as part of you. That is something you have never seen before. Looking at it, allows you to have a completely new experience. The flow of your feelings is exciting and challenges you toward new unknown frontiers of learning and enjoyment that no one else has.

                                            You can do it!